The Dalton and Michael Awards

A prestigious British business magazine owned by the Financial Times has named Premier Dalton McGuinty its world “personality of the year.”

Praising him as “outgoing and upbeat in that very North American way,” the five-year-old publication hails his “infectious enthusiasm” and notes that “should Ontarians run short on energy, they could always plug in to their high-octane leader.”

Read the entire article from Foreign Direct Investment magazine

Here’s the original Toronto Star article

Here are the responses from the Ontario PC party and the Ontario NDP party

So much did I appreciate the additional awards suggested by the Progressive Conservatives that I am proposing that these additional awards be presented to Michael Bryant, the Attorney General of Ontario and architect of that province’s infamous “pit bull” ban.

The Hill’s Public Relations Award of the CVMA for enhancing the public image of the veterinary profession because “you can be one, too” according to his new dog legislation.

The CVMA Humane Award for having contributed significantly to the welfare and well-being of animals, particularly by publicly promoting the “humanity” of mass destruction of thousands of dogs and the eventual extinction of three purebred breeds.

The Human Rights Award (or the Human Rights Lawyer of the Year Award) for warrantless entries, groundless seizure of private property, and discriminatory imprisonment of Canadian citizens.

The Nobel Prize for Physics for discovering that one type of dog can lock its jaws, despite all scientific and biological evidence to the contrary.

The Nobel Prize for Medicine for discovering that a dog may have extra levels of endorphins in its brain because of the way its body is shaped. A second prize was awarded for providing an unlimited supply of healthy, good-tempered dogs to biological research facilities.

The Canadian Journal of Statistics Award for the discovery of new methods of calculations that can produce extremely high and prejudicial numbers from extraordinarily small and unreliable data.

The Lawmaker of the Year Award for creating what is arguably the most vague and uninterpretable law in the country.

The City of Toronto’s Outstanding Commitment to Community Safety Award for removing from our streets, our fields, and our family rooms, these unidentifiable, indefinable, mythical monsters with no history of unusual danger to the public.

The Child Safety Award in recognition of the entire Ontario Liberal government’s commitment to child safety, as encapsulated so succintly in the Legislature by Tim Peterson (Liberal MPP for Mississauga South) who spouted, “One child attacked, one person killed, are too many for a breed of dog”, conveniently ignoring the fact that at least 12 unique breeds have killed people in Canada and over 35 unique breeds have killed people in the United States, also ignoring the fact that virtually every breed on the planet has attacked at least one child.

There is one more award that doesn’t exist yet, but should: Mr. Bryant should receive country-wide recognition for violating the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms not once, not twice, not even three, four, or five times, but SIX times in a single piece of legislation. That must be a record and is certainly worthy of acknowledgment.

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